What's really underneath it all?

Today I was walking down Hawthorne on my way to work. It was cold and before 9 am. I wasn't the happiest camper on the street. As I was walking I looked down to see grass in the cracks of the sidewalk. I started seeing this more often as I was looking for it. I couldn't help but think "If we ripped up the roads and sidewalks, would there be beautiful lush grass hiding under there?" Of course the honest side of me thought "Um, no. You know better. They ruined everything before they laid the asphalt or concrete." But I couldn't help but think of the multiple occasions I've witnessed ripping  up dingy, ugly carpet from the 70s, only to find beautiful, original hard wood floors.

If I ripped off the negative, ugly layer of me, what would I find? What would glow from my bottom layer, my inner-ness. The layer which has witnessed a little more of my life and knows how serious things are, and how serious things aren't, and how instead of getting upset, just finding the positive in it and letting it go.

Yesterday I, along with quite a few other Dosha employees, and AIP students, had a speaker who is Aveda. She lives and breathes it, and honestly it wouldn't hurt if there were a few of us a little more like her. She asked us to channel our inner beauty, and find the true beauty in others. Not just the outer layer which my job is obsessed with. When asked "What could make the world a better place?" I searched high and low for my answer. I could answer all the other ones-
Q "Who's the most beautiful person I know?" A "Duh, My mom"
Q "I feel beautiful when..." A "I'm with the people I love"
Q "Beauty is..." A "Raw"
Q "What could make the world a better place?"

hm. Well now I know my answer after sitting on that question for a little over 24 hours.
A "If we would all peel away the rough, negative layer of ourselves to see our own inner beauty, it would be a lot easier for others to see it, and for you to see theirs."
It's as simple as that.

Or is it?

Right now I'm dealing with handling being a hypocrite. All day I'm irritated with people who are so unhappy in their lives. So I tell them, CHANGE IT! If it's that awful, change it, or stop complaining about it. Well I've realized, with the help of friends, that I am being that girl.
So here's to change. It's much smaller than some other changes I've made in the past few months, but still scary. In the end I'm hoping for happiness, more estrogen, and less football, and possibly peeling back one of those layers to bring myself, and everyone else, closer to viewing my inner beauty.